Posts Tagged 'Men jealous'

Because older men get jealous of younger men

This one bot sexes are guilty of, but what interests me particularly is the way envy of those younger manifests itself. With women it manifests as insecurity.

Wirth men, envy of the young manifests itself as denial.

Older Men will compete with the younger man in ruthless blood-letting ways, even when the younger man is his own son, and even when the son is under six.

There is almost nothing men fear as much as the faster, younger man.

But as I have said above, this fear extends even to their own child. I have seen this time and time again. Once a boy hits ten, his father will start to turn. It will be slight things initially, a faint rebuttal when the boy wants comfort, slightly rougher than usual rough-housing, and the teasing might go in a little too long if the boy catches fewer baskets than his dad. 

Men have tried to justify this behaviour with the “old bull / young bull” theory. You know the one. That the old bull has his herd of cows, and the younger bull wants in, so the too have to fight it out to see who is going to get the herd. This is an interesting theory except for two glaring problems. The young boy never wants to be a rival to his dad and is attacked into it by his mid teens when he has been so harassed he is simply lashing out. And no man, (and statistically extremely few in history) have ever owned a “herd” of women.

Of course men have never let facts get in the way of a good “scientific” theory, so why start now. Older men will continue to find justification for attacking younger men, because they are not at all ready to give the pleasure up.

In romance novels the men are NICE! they are good to their wives and better to their children. That is the ultimate fantasy man, and one of the main messages of this blog is, it is not that difficult to give a woman what she’;d like. You just have to open your eyes.

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Because men are petty

red blinds

One of the advantages of telling everyone you’re not emotional or obsessed with silly little details is that when you are emotional and obsessed with silly little details, you can tell everyone you’re not. And they believe it.

Because it’s so important for a man to believe the mythology they’ve created around masculinity but also impossible to live up to the mythology they’ve created around masculinity, they become obsessed with petty details that become deeply important. The best way to recognise this is in his perpetual reinforcing of the stereotypes.

If you hop out of the car and help a man change the tyre, he will be forced to make a comment about his physical superiority. If you answer a question correctly ahead of him in a trivia contest, he will be forced to ‘teach’ you something on the way home (if he is kind) or publicly humiliate you (if he is not kind). If you earn more money than him, he will find a way to tell you (in public of course) that he refused a promotion, or a job that would have paid him better. There is no win too small, no superior moment too unobtrusive and no fear of not being superior too ridiculous for a man. He will find a way to challenge you, out of his panic, if he has the slightest feeling you are superior (or even on par) over him in some way.

Asserting masculinity is a full time job (as is asserting femininity) because it is so unnatural. It needs to be verbally reinforced because it is not obvious from behaviours.

In romance novels sexual stereotypes are not vehemently preserved. Men sleep with men and are still thought of as alpha males. Women sleep with several men at one time and are not thought of as easy. Because it’s a fantasy it is allowed to transcend the social barriers that define masculine and feminine.

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