Posts Tagged 'writing'

Because women think writing their goals out is getting their goals done

Because women think writing their goals out is getting their goals done

Ask any woman if she has or has had a journal, and I bet the overwhelming answer to that question will be yes. If she says no, she’s lying.

Women love journals. I have mentioned it on this blog before. They particularly like them with beautiful or interesting covers. Women like to touch them, own them and write in them but more than anything else, they like to buy them.

And what is it exactly that women do with these journals once they own them?

Wy they write down their hopes and dreams of course.

And most women’s hopes and dreams occur in the form of to do lists. That is, lists of all the things they have to do in order to become all the things they wish to be.
Women wish to be so many things. They want to be: nicer, smarter, thinner, have better skin, have better hair, have better nails, better clothes. better home, a better cook, a better mother, a better wife, a better daughter, better at work, better cleaner of clothes, cars and houses, better with their free time and better with their busy times.

Women want to get better at everything they do, and ultimately, the best way they can achieve this is to write it in a journal and then look at the wonderful dreams, come to life on the page.

And then that generally satisfies the yearning. Once they can see the dreams written out in black and white that satisfies the craving they had for their lives to be different.

At least for a while.

In romance novels, usually women write their hopes and dreams out in a journal and before they know it, the entire scenario has come true, but a wonderful man leaping out of the pages of a book to satisfy them, a fairy godmother providing them with the new man and the new life, or just a strange series of circumstances coinciding for them to have everything that they want. One thing you will never see in a romance novel is a long hard slog that takes most of their lives being the way dreams come true – because after all, this is about dreams, wishes and fantasies, not real life.

 And every romance reader knows it.



Because men don’t understand why a woman asks for advice and then won’t take it

‘She’ll ask for your advice

Your reply will be concise

She’ll listen very nicely

Then go out and do precisely what she wants’

Henry Higgins – My Fair lady

Asking for advice is just that. Asking for advice.

It always seems to astonish men when women ask for advice and then do something different. This is primarily because men don’t know what asking for advice is. They see it as a weakness, assuming everyone should be born knowing everything already. When it comes to advice they never ask for it, nor do they take it.

So it comes as a delight when a woman does ask for advice, because they have a chance to 1) impart their genius (which they love) and 2) give her direction (which they also love).

But it isn’t like that for women. Women ask for advice because they are weighing things up. And here is a scary thing to know. Often, they don’t actually want nor need the advice. They are really summing you up over a certain issue. So for men, when a woman asks for some information, they assume she doesn’t know something and wants to learn. But for a woman, it’s a chance to see the other person.

Deep inside every man is a belief that he is a genius (we have seen this before) so it is perfectly natural that everyone who knows them should ask for their advice. It makes sense in the way they see the world. It’s not in the asking they are surprised. It is in the mulling over his advice, the weighing it up against other advice you’ve collected and then, if it isn’t the best advice received, rejecting it. This is what men can’t get their heads around.

Which leads me to another point. Men will very often happily give advice on topics they know nothing about. Because no matter how little they know, they will be absolutely sure of one thing: they know more than their woman does on the subject.

In romance novels women do ask for advice and they do take it or they don’t take it depending on the quality of the advice, and men simply say they don’t really know if they don’t. It is all clear and it is all simple. The people who give bad advice in romance novels are villains, and the baddies always get theirs in the end.


Because men use emotional blackmail to get what they want


I know it has usually been men who complain about this one from women, but it is true for both sexes in the way they deal with each other when it comes to relating.

Picture this scenario:

“Where are you going tonight?”

“Out with the girls?”

Deep sigh and looks back at the football game.


She moves around getting ready. He says nothing but stars in a moody way at the TV,.

“Is everything ok honey?”

“”Yeah. Why wouldn’t it be?”

“You seem upset.”

“did you tell me about this thing with the girls?”
“I did tell you. Last week, then again on Monday and then last night as well.”

Stony silence as he watches the TV.

“Are you ok honey?”
“Why wouldn’t I be ok? What is your problem? Just leave me alone to watch the game by myself, will you?”

“I left you dinner in the fridge.”

“I’m going out for a burger.”

And on it goes till she either decides to stay home at which point he will say its her choice, he didn’t make her, cause a fight and storm out after the game to go out with his mates – or go to bed early and roll over with his back to her.

Men have been using these and other manipulation techniques since they were babies on their mothers. Women don’t have the same talent for it, as we never received the same attention men did from them mothers. Men are absolute masters at manipulating a woman and then convincing her that it is all their fault.

The best one of course (as we have seen recently) is the jealousy factor. They’ll ogle other women in the street, which sends a very clear signal of “you’re not good enough” to their partner whose beauty used to be all they needed (I mean can you imagine what would happen if SHE got another guy to perform the male roles  – if he came home to find another guy changing light bulbs, fixing the car and mowing the lawns) and when she get upset they will  – and this is always done (mysteriously) with unnecessary aggression – tell her that she is insane and that she needs therapy, or that she has a terrible personal issue. Of course the reason they are even having the conversation is HIS insecurity.

In romance novels the men can still be manipulative, because women are bad at identifying this still. But if they are, their insecurity is always obvious and their lover nurses (and kisses) all their problems away.


Because women go back to bad relationships

I’m not talking here about the women that go back to men who beat them when they share children. That is a whole other pathology; that is one of mutual pain and suffering.

I am talking here about the women who break up with their boyfriend who, for example cheated, or abused her in front of her friends, or generally treated her like crap.

When you break up with someone, there is an intimacy that has been broken. It is over. There is a crushing moment of realization that can last for hours or days. This is a feeling that must be endured, because you were intimate with that person. Even if they don’t admit it, or say it isn’t happening to them as well, they are going through it, and it is an inevitable aspect of separation.

As I said above, this moment must be endured. This is the moment you are most likely to get the phone all, the invite to the pub for a drink. Please understand ladies, that what you are doing here is going back to the man who cheated on you or who treated you like crap. Just because he is being nice to you in the pub where you’re meeting, does not mean he has changed. In fact, it is far more likely that if he is attracted to you in any way, he definitely has not changed, because the two of you were mutually playing off a problem you both have and will when you get together in the future.

You need a fresh man. That is called growth and moving forward, Not the same guy with a new (or worse old) set of promises that he has given up his wild ways.

Please, please, please prepare for the moment of separation anxiety. Plan to go out with friends, go away for a holiday in Paris (this is when your fuck you money is so important) or just force yourself to busy yourself out of the place that he has put you that is no good for you.

This is one of the most essential things that women can learn. How to leave a man properly who is bad for them. Do you know what the BEST thing about the powerful breakup is? You are very unlikely to repeat the mistake.

In romance novels there is simply no such thing as a breakup unless the guy is bad, and then the women will mull and be sad, but they will move on as soon as knight in shining armor shows up. Happy ever after is the creed of erotic romance novels and women just don’t have to worry about ugly things like bad breakups.

Because men will only wash up if they are being paid to do it

We have seen in some earlier posts that men seem to be allergic to housework. Of all the advances made in the so called “battle of the sexes” this is an area famous for the least progression to have occurred.

It’s interesting. We say that feminism is hard on men and that it is difficult for men to know who they are now days, however, it look literally ten years for men to embrace the notion of women bringing home as much money as them. The idea that their wife would bring home more than her own pocket money lit up their eyes and had them champion the streets for women’s rights.

However, where they used to say “I don’t have to do the housework, because I worked all day” and no longer can, for some reason the housework is still only being done by women.

Men aren’t arguing. They agree that they SHOULD do their bit. They simply never get around to it or they do such a crap job that the woman has to follow them around re doing any sort of work they’ve started in the first place.

One of the most offensive jobs is the simple task of washing up. A woman will come to the full drainer, seeing all the shiny pots and plates twinkling in the sun and immediately see that the undersides are streaked with melted cheese and the sun is actually glistening in grease streaks.

However, put a man in an industrial kitchen, pay him a wage, and explain the law of hygiene inspector, and you have a washing up machine that is superior to all the mechanized systems in the industrial world.

Now the standards in restaurants are there because of cleanliness issues. If you do not have a scrupulously clean work space in a kitchen, you ruin the risk of poisoning large bodies of people. Men understand this. It is what they would call “logic”.  However, translate that same argument to the house (and remember we’re not looking for restaurant standards here – we just want to keep wild animals at bay) and you have a whole other creature on your hands. This time the man will not (absolutely will not) do the washing up, and if he is found in the unfortunate position where he is washing up, then he will not do it well.

In romance novels men want to do the work that has to be done around the house, purely because he can’t stand seeing his woman in the uncomfortable position of having to do it all herself. Any man lucky enough to have his dinner cooked for him and the washing up done after, acts as though he’s just won the lottery. It never occurs to them that they shouldn’t have to.


Because women try too hard and do too much

What is the motivation behind doing things for people who didn’t ask you to do it and didn’t actually want it done in the first place? Why would a perfectly normal human being put themselves in that position?

The almost complete definition of frustration must be knocking yourself out for someone when they didn’t ask you to do what you’re doing, and then getting resentful when they don’t thank you for the trouble you went to.

As long as women refuse to take responsibility for what they want in their lives and for their own selves, they will continue to have this feeling.

A classic example of this is the clean house that more resembles a person with and OCD psychosis than a comfortable home where people are clean and their possessions are neat and cared for. This is one of the best examples of women overextending themselves and over capitalizing in what they need. Women need their homes to be beautiful so they can show off to each other and bully their families into regimented behavior. If women are going to get some real power in their lives around themselves and how they spend their very few valuable years here, then they need to let go of getting all their self esteem from how clean the house is.

This has been observed in first year university female students as well. The drive to do well has them staying up late and working so hard that they overachieve in the early days, where their masculine contemporaries are simply doing what is required of them. By mid course, the men have out ranked the exhausted women and by the end they achieve higher accolades.

Women think that if they just work hard, and get a lot done in the day, that they are productive and useful. But it is not necessarily the case. You can spend all day running around in circles and you may look busy but it does not translate that you have had a very productive day.

In romance novels women are able to have a perfectly clean house, an immaculately balanced budget, a well fitting wardrobe and excellent grades. This goes with the territory of sleeping next to a Greek God. Of course, this is a fantasy that women like to indulge in, but the intelligent women who read these books for their leisure know that it is only a story and that life isn’t nor should be like this.


Vote for my short story on ME


Hey there fellow readers in blog sphere.

I have a short story currently in competition, that I’d LOVE your vote on!

Hop over here, and log in. This is a wonderful magazine, with quality images, stories, and articles about life in the more sophisticated erotic realms, and recently it has become free to join.

My story is called Send in the Clowns. You can always send me feedback here.

Thanks to all



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